Somebody Has To Say It #2: Having A Crush is Totally Depressing

Thesaurus defined crush as "to break, pound or grind into small fragments or powder"; "a usual temporary infatuation." Either way, the end product is always similar, broken. 

Deeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeppp. Gosh, I get it. Moving along.

Frankly, having a crush on someone isn't always depressing. What's depressing is that it remains as a crush forever. We all are aware of the love cycle; strangers, crush/friends, love. Yes, but this isn't just an ordinary Barbie tale. This is life. We all have wandered into our classrooms, workplace or even campus, peering and glancing quickly at one specific person. We sigh and chant questions subconsciously, why isn't that person mine yet? or why can't I muster enough courage and boldness to tell the person about my feelings for them?

Why? Because we all are afraid of being crushed if we tell that person about our feelings.

Some of us have to realise that until we make a move, nothing will happen. You stare blankly at your mobile phone's screen. Her/his name and number written on the screen. You fingers smoothly drew closer to the green dial button on the left curvature of your screen. NO. NO. I shouldn't. What if she/he's busy? What if they find me annoying? And you cut to the home screen and switch off your mobile phone. PEOPLE. How can we assume that she's gonna cut the call if we never made the call?

To those that have managed to express their feelings and escape the valley of friendzones, congratulations. No, seriously. Friendzone is a horrible abyss. I've managed to actually express my feelings to my crush once. I was certain about my efforts, live or die trying. In the end, she admitted that she too have feelings for me. Stupid enough, I said that we shouldn't jump abruptly into a relationship, as it would throw both of our lives into chaos. C'mon guys, I was fourteen. 

Honestly, I'm not mocking anybody's crush in this mind-to-blog perception. This post isn't written to illustrate how hard you can get crushed by your crush nor to depict the struggles of having a crush. This is merely an advice to everyone out there who wake up, thinking that their crush will be theirs one day; you'll never get what you want if you don't go for it.

Go for that person. Tell that person that they're your world. 

A friend once told me, "you may be one person to the world, but you can also be the world to one person." 

Just another wild scribble,
TJ.

Somebody Has To Say It: Pendidikan Moral is a Extreme Prodigality

Hi readers. Been a while? Errrmm yeah. Well, writer's block kicked in and got me all fuzzy. Before we splash into the title of the post, I would like to thank all my readers and wish everyone a - late - Happy New Year. I would also like to apologise and promise to make some time to update my blog every now and then.

Somebody Has To Say It #1 : Pendidikan Moral is an Extreme Prodigality

Bold, some might say. I am actually expecting a lot of criticism and negative feedbacks towards my choice of post. I would like to clear the tension in the air and remind everybody that I do not intend to insult anybody but just expressing my perception.

To readers that aren't too familiar with Malaysia and the education system here, Pendidikan Moral is a subject taught to Standard One students and all the way to Form Five. So, basically a normal Malaysian student studying at a government school would study Pendidikan Moral for eleven years. For the first six years, the questions and syllabus are purely nothing but the science of logic and deduction. More of what would you do if you were there stuff.

Once you pave your way into Form One, students will scratch the heads and sigh loudly, wah? Or even a desperate what the heck sigh! Because it doesn't make any sense. Pendidikan Moral syllabus in  the secondary schools are divided into thirty-six chapters, each for a moral value. Such Kepercayaan Kepada Tuhan (Belief in God) being the first chapter. And each moral value consist of two three lines of exaggerated so-called definitions. To everyone questioning my opinion, how can I accept a general definition of a moral value when my accounts of the moral value are different? What if my definition of the value is different from what is stated? 

If so, isn't that the right method? Assessment should be based upon what the students think about the value and how they define the value. But, is that how it works? NO. The syllabus is meant to test students ability to remember thirty six exaggerated definitions, only for the students to forget what or how they think the value is. And apparently, even misplacing a word in the essay-looking definitions would earn no empathy from the marking scheme. The marking scheme cites it as an wrong answer. What the heck?

One should always remember that not everyone who aces Pendidikan Moral examination really have moral values and ethics in themselves and not everyone who doesn't ace his Moral examination doesn't have moral ethics.

To those readers who think I'm just a student who's complaining because I can't ace it, you're wrong and that's a horrible lie. I generally think it's just a pure prodigality if the examination syllabus doesn't change. Pendidikan Moral is an important subject, but for the moral values to be properly instilled in each student, remembering thirty six definitions is certainly not the way.

Before I rest my case, I would like to apologise to anyone who felt hurt, offended, unappreciated or exasperated by my views. I would like to insist that I am merely expressing my thoughts and views into words. Only words - not bitter insults. I am not condemning my alma mater, teachers nor students or even the syllabus. What you are reading - here - is nothing but me saying that what's being done is not efficient enough.

Thank you. 

 TJ.